Episode 2: A Vamp by Any Other Name...
Brief Summary
Two new vampire gangs have popped up in town. Their leaders have both been granted unusual powers by a strange but powerful entity that feeds upon the souls of the insane. A vampire named Drake shows up in town, and latches on to Kat and Anita for reasons they don't yet know.
Quotes of the Week
Kat
(In a nasal voice): "Oh, it's always about Buffy, isn't it? Buffy's so cool, Buffy's got way cooler Scoobies than I do. Mine are just psychopaths."
Walter
(Pointing at Drake): "Um, is everyone here very drunk!? He's a VAMPIRE!!!"
"I'm going to fill up a couple 1-gallon cans of gasoline...just in case."
Anita: He [DRAKE] may be a vampire; I just think he has a purpose to fill in all of this.
"Oh, I get it. The little wimpy minion vampire wished to be a big vampire. Like Tom Hanks. Only Evil."
Kat, Anita, Jon, and Walter
Anita: A slayer has a job to do.
Drake
"I'm currently on a 12-step program for my drinking problem."
"Excuse me, would you mind putting that cross down? I'm on the phone."
Cyan
(On seeing Drake bite the head off of a rat to feed): "Now that's about the most disgusting thing I've ever seen."
Jon
(Regarding his "understanding" with Anita about his being formerly in the Initiative): "She doesn't say the 'I' word, and I don't say the 'S' word."
(On being referred to as a "Scooby"): "I'm Fred."
(Cyan bangs at Jon's door at 12:00 noon, waking him up from a bender the night before. He's unaware of who is knocking): "Go away. I have a gun."
Anita
(On the cell phone, leaving John and Walter talking to Drake as she drives away with Kat): "Hey, John. Anita. That guy Drake is a vampire."
(Off of the groups bitching about how bad a day it's going to be): "You know, you guys are the bitchiest group of demon hunters I've ever seen!"
(I know I've forgotten TONS of quotes from this week...this will probably be updated a lot).
Walter: Ok, Gandalf.
Walter: Um, what's a slayer?
Jon: Anita, what did we talk about with the "S" word?
Kat: Filleter, Walter. She said, Filleter. I fillet fish. A lot of fish. I...Ok, it's someone who takes a lot of gym class and eats their Wheaties.
(Director's response): "You're a gay guy in a neckerchief?"
Notable moments
Drake tries to take out Mark, but falls prey to Mark's vampire hypnosis.
All his direct strategies failed, and being held aloft and choked by Gary, Jon resorts to the old "kick in the nads" routine to save his own life.
Anita calls Giles to get information about the Djinn, and between Giles and the Twilight Order (she's a Witchcraft character) she begins to suspect something very, very bad is about to go down. (My series is taking place concurrently with the TV show, so she also fears for her and her slayer's lives.)
Drake takes Cyan to dinner and treats her like a perfect gentleman.
Jon offers Anita a pie in exchange for a bottle of whiskey he left at her house. He also sends her flowers to thank her for her hospitality as they all met to formulate their plan of attack. He later recieves (delivered to his doorstep) a stuffed penguin with no card.
Walter realizes the ring tone of his cell phone somehow got set to "C'mon, Everybody, Get Happy" and he doesn't know how to change it.
Drake earns Walter's grudging respect when he saves both Walter and Kat in the melee at the mall.