The Nocturnum
Episode 13: I Want You to Kill the Ice Cream Man
Original Air Date: 5/22/2005
This episode is based upon and expanded from a Call of Cthulhu scenario written by Dr. Michael C. LaBossiere. The original can be found here.
On a more personal note, my players rock. Leave it to them to turn a goofy one-off into an angst-ridden trip down the horrors of addiction and madness, and tie it into one of our overall sub-plots all by themselves. The Cyan bits were NOT planned by me at all when I prepared this episode.
Special Guest Star
Alysson Hannigan as Willow
Brief Synopsis
The Cast is enjoying a well-earned break from the horrors of the past few weeks by having lunch at a posh outdoor restaurant and cafe called The Union Grill, when a man dressed in what was once an expensive suit, but now is little more than filthy shreds, approaches them with an outlandish story about how a creature is disguising itself as an ice cream man and travelling the country, killing children. The man introduces himself as Larry Helmsworth and continues. The creature, Larry says, killed his own son and Larry began to track it. He thought he'd found it, but when he shot what he thought was the creature, he discovered he'd kill an innocent man. Now he has to go turn himself in, but he needs the Cast to go kill the Ice Cream Man.
At first the Cast dismisses him as a psychopath. Then they start seeing unusual threads in his story that lead them to think they should at least look into it. Sure enough, they discover that there is something out of the ordinary about this trend. As the group debates how ludicrous this whole thing is, John decides to go to Dave and Andy's to get everyone some ice cream. Drake finds he loves the stuff and is later dismayed to find out that it melts if you let it sit.
As they investigate, they discover the truth, that a creature is in fact moving from town to town, selling an ice cream truck, then murdering and replacing the buyer. It is then using parasites and chemicals to mind control children, who it grinds up in a strange machine and eats.
As the Cast tracks down the Ice Cream Man, Cyan uses magic to spy on the creature, and gets a rush from it. This leads her to more dark knowledge: she has figured out how to steal magic from other people, items, and books, and use it for her own purposes. After Drake scolds her for using magic, and tells John and Anita about the episode, Cyan calls Willow for support. They chat for a few minutes, and Cyan tells everyone she's going home. On her way out she tries to power boost from a kid, but botches the spell. She leaves, determined to find someone else to try it again.
A few minutes later (as a consequence of her botched spell) a massive, red-skinned demon appears in the middle of the Hive Arcana, leaving John, Drake, and Anita to deal with the thing. They lure it into a back alley and kill it. Anita apologizes to the crowd milling around and passes out free drink coupons.
Before she goes home, Cyan stops off at Eat n' Park, where she successfully steals magic from an innocent Goth kid who happens to be Gifted. Completely juiced, she becomes Dark Cyan, controlled by urges for self-gratification, and proceeds to return home and destroy Drake's house, and slash the tires on his bike, in retribution for his telling on her.
John has noticed Cyan is missing and calls her cell phone. They talk for a few minutes, and John can tell from her voice and speech patterns that she's high as a kite. John determines that they must take care of the Ice Cream Man, and goes off on his own to kill the creature, which he succeeds in doing with little trouble. The creature's strength was in stealth, not combat, and with his powers, John is able to stop the creature from escaping. Anita and Drake rush to find Cyan before she does something she'll regret.
Too late. Cyan goes back out into the town, and when a punk kid hits on her, she takes him into an alley and murders him. She then goes to the cemetary and kills a vampire before finally crashing, and passing out from exhaustion.
The Cast discover the damage she's done to Drake's house, and use a locator spell to find her. They take her home, where Anita wakes Cyan up with smelling salts, and informs her she's going to England whether she likes it or not. Cyan tearfully confesses to having murdered a man, and asks Anita if she's going to call the police. Anita declines to do so, saying she just wants to help Cyan get better.
The next morning, John takes Cyan to England and turns her over to Willow, who promises to keep in touch with regular updates on her progress.
Great Quotes:
John: Do you like have a wierdo magnet in you or something?
Anita: It would explain a lot, wouldn't it, John?
John: Something has to explain Walter.
Drake: D.D.T.
Drake: So let me get this straight. Now we have to hunt down and kill a frozen confectionary seller?
Anita (to Jamie): So...what do you know about ice cream men?
Anita: I have never killed anyone by accident. I kill with absolute intent and pure malice, thank you very much.
John: Yes, but what would it want children for?
Anita: They always need children, John.
John: It's a Pied Piper thing.
Anita: Excuse me?
John: You know, the Pied Piper, took the kids away...
(Anita looks at him blankly)
John: Look, in this day and age, kids aren't going to follow some jackass with a flute, but ice cream...
Anita: You've spent way too much time thinking about this.
John: That's entirely up to Anita.
Anita: What?
John: Who I kill. You're the boss.
Anita: I wish that were true. I sure as hell wasn't the boss when you shot the little fat kid in the face!
Drake: I'll do some research on the other end...I'm going to Dave and Andy's.
Anita: Okay, you know how Scottish guys who drink a lot of beer, they get that big belly? If you eat a lot of ice cream, that'll happen to you.
Drake: So what you're saying is...ice cream makes you Scottish?
Cyan: He won't get fat right away. Not if he exercises.
Anita: You can explain that to him. I'm not one for exercising. Well, not that kind of exercise, anyway.
John: Lucky Alan.
Anita: You're sick. I kill things, that's my kind of exercise!
Cyan:...so, you try that sparkly K-Y, yet?
(Anita leaves the room)
Drake: That never stops being funny.
Cyan: Tell him the truck is evil!
John: The police can't confiscate a truck for being evil.
(re: Anita's wardrobe)
Cyan: I offered to take her shopping--on me--because it was just so sad.
(Anita and Cyan to go Western Psychiatric to question Larry further)
Larry: I found you through your website.
Anita: We have a website? Nobody told me we had a website.
Larry: Why are you wasting time here!? You have to kill the Ice Cream Man!!! I want you to kill the Ice Cream Man!!!
Other inmates: Ice Cream Man! Kill the Ice Cream Man! Ice Cream Man! Kill the Ice Cream Man!
(Anita and Cyan put their heads down and quickly leave)
(Re: a huge demon that magically appears in the middle of the Hive Arcana)
Drake: So John...think he's here for coffee?
Cyan: Anita, I really hate to say this, but I don't think it's safe for you to be in here with me.
Anita: I'll kill you. You're my best friend and I love you, but I will kill you.
Cyan: I really have to go to the bathroom.
Anita: You can go right where you are.
Cyan: That's sick. You can come in with me.
Anita: You can go right there.
Cyan: Why can't I go to the bathroom?
Anita: Drake, go find a bowl for Cyan to use to go to the bathroom in.
(Drake goes downstairs, where John waits in the kitchen, and grabs a bowl from the kitchen cabinet)
Drake: Are you attached to this?
John: What's it for?
Drake: Are you attached to this?
John: It's our mixing bowl. What's it for?
(Drake leaves with the bowl. John calls after him)
John: Drake! I will shoot you! What's it for?
(John comes upstairs)
John: So what's going on?
Cyan: They won't let me go to the bathroom.
John: And exactly when did we revoke toilet privileges?
Anita: Since she became very dangerous.
John: Go in with her. She's no more dangerous in there than out here. Besides, it's against the Geneva Convention.
Cyan: John...do you still want to marry me?
John: Of course.
Cyan: Let's do it. Now. Before I go.
John: We don't have time.
Cyan: After we get to England, then.
Great moments:
John gets angry with the group for being completely inept in their investigation.
Cyan uses magic and Drake completely goes off on her, then calls Anita and John about the issue.
John buys Cyan a mess of self-help books on overcoming addiction.
Due to a miscast spell by Cyan, a huge red demon appears in the middle of the Hive. It tries to attack John, but the anti-violence spell kicks in, blasting it backwards through the counter. Anita, panicked over her property damage, foolishly leads the thing outside where the anti-violence spell doesn't affect it. Together, she, Drake, and John kill the thing. Anita calmly goes back inside and hands otu free drink coupons to the frightened patrons.
Cyan power boosts and is overwhelmed by the dark magic. She murders a punk in cold blood, destroys Drake's house, torches a vampire, and crashes, unconscious, in a cemetary.
John takes Cyan to England for "rehab" with Willow, Giles, and the Devonshire Coven. They get married before Cyan goes into seclusion.
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